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April 27, 2012 Filed in africa,faith,photography

the winner of the Alexander Creative Family Rules poster is…..

Love this! Thanks for the opportunity!!

Posted by: sharon y. | April 20, 2012 at 02:17 PM

send me your info sharon y. and i will hook you up with Ryan Alexander!

now if you didn't win….go get your own!! 

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so i said yesterday i was missing pam and dreaming about going back to africa.
it's on my mind everyday.
i feel like…. i am in some kind of pull between what i know is right and what i do anyway….like shopping among many other things.
i know that spending money on "things" that mean nothing is not right.
meaning: it's worthless. 
but i like those things….cute clothes….shoes….new jewelry.
but it means NOTHING to God.
and shouldn't i care about what God cares about?
shouldn't i want what HE wants for me?

i know that He does not want my time and thoughts and money to be spent on clothes and nothingness.
even if i do look super cute…i can't take it with me when i die.
going to africa to visit pam doesn't mean i can't go shopping…it's not that.
it means i feel messy in my heart and mind and can't make sense of it yet.
God is the only one who can resolve this issue in me.
and He will keep working on me i am sure of that. 

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then i got these books….and i'm done for.
i am on chapter ONE of katie's book and i canNOT stop the tears.
the entire time….every word….crying.
have you read this book?  after only chapter one i would say YOU SHOULD.
and her blog?
it will wreck you. 

and i am scared to read seven.
very scared.

pam and i email each other quite a bit.  
her emails are so special to me.  
i read them over and over.
once i read them out loud over dinner because she and i were coresponding back and forth right then.
i wanted my family to be amazed at what God is doing through them and for them.
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her son wrote a book and it's on kindle!  
he is so talented.
we downloaded it on sean's kindle and he loved it!  
sean said "that is so cool that jake wrote it AND it's on kindle!"  
it inspired him.
it's called The War Horn….you can download it here for $2.99
he's using the funds to help raise money for a trip back to the US to go to a writing camp….awesome. 

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way to go jake.
i am so proud of you!   

 

and now….on a completely DIFFERENT subject

i am going to take the year off from taking family photos.
i just can't get it all done.
it makes me sad but coming to that decision has been a relief.
there are things i want to do but haven't because the photo season loomed over my head.
thinking "i won't have time once pictures start up again"

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i did do one session.
love them.
levi and griffin are just plain cute in every way.
and tickling works for smiles when the chickens were too distratcing behind me. 

🙂

thank jess and joel for being my only clients this year.  

ha!

i have a lot of you ask about my lens and camera.
i use a Canon 50D and i only own one lens….canon 24-70 f/2.8
so every picture on this blog for two years now has been with that lens.
unless they are my phone pictures.

 

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tom petty was really good.
his voice sounds exactly the same as it ever has…it was pretty incredible.
he was so gracious "thank you so much!" after every song and sounding like he deeply meant it.
it is so crazy to sit at a concert & look at the performer that wrote a song that i have been singing my whole life.
to watch them sing it!?
it's surreal.
i LOVE that about live music.
he didn't play wildflowers though….my most favorite….bummer.
but it was a great show. 

and i liked being there with mr. duerksen.
he's my my real most favorite.

 

Lauryn - 1. Never allow a love (photography) to become a burden. It sucks the joy out of it, and there are so few things in life (other than family) that bring true joy. Take the time off and enjoy life. Photographing beautiful families will be there next season 🙂
2. Tom Petty is amazing. I saw him a few years back and was blown away by his sound. I loved his show. Seeing him live was awesome. Glad you enjoyed it 🙂

Sara - You were right that reading Katie’s blog will wreck you. I just read two posts and watched the About Katie video. I might just have to sit on my couch and cry for a few minutes. I have never seen such radiance and joy on such a beautiful face. What an extraordinary young woman, so obedient to the Lord. My heart is quickened and cut with conviction.
Thank you for creating a blog worth returning to over and over.

heather loschiavo - i had to read Seven twice because it hit me right where God has been talking to me for the past few years. and i love the way she writes, its like she’s just talking to you.

Jess - So exciting to hear what God is doing in your heart, Megan…even if you are not quite sure what to make of it yet. Keep sharing. And THANK YOU for taking our pictures. You are the best. I love the one you posted and can’t wait to see the rest.

ira lee - we just talked about being idolators in church. shopping, tv, gadgets, anything that takes our focus away from God is an idol!!!!! agreeing with what you said, its not that shopping, or having tv time is wrong, but if the need, addiction, desire to do or buy those things blurs your dedication to the lord, then that is putting those objects or activities above God, which is idolizing! he just laid it out there and it just really clicks!

Alicia @ La Famille - convicting post especially after i just spent a boatload of $$ at ikea this weekend. i struggle with the “how much is ok” and the “how often is ok” questions…it’s hard because i know me and i’m a person that loves to fluff her nest. that requires shopping…so ya. i’m afraid of both of those books. my friend is reading 7 and its got her all convicted…eek! wise decision with the photo break. you are smart to do that. happy monday, ms. meg 🙂

the whyte house - i took the year off from doing photos, too. granted i only have two and a less hectic schedule, but with my husband deploying…well, you really don’t have to give an explanation after saying that, right? 🙂 i like having less to plan around, too. leaves more room for random trips out of town and such.
i see jess every now and then after her bible study(my son is in pre-k at the church)and i tell myself i’m going to say hi to her and then chicken out. not that i really have any reason to say hi, but sometimes people appreciate it…i hope. 🙂

gayle - I am 69 and live a very blessed full life. I have everything I could desire but I don’t desire worldly goods any more. I wear what I have, I don’t follow trends, I give freely and I feel good! You are good and you will do what is right for you. I don’t think God wants us to deprive ourselves when we have worked hard to achieve money and success. It is a constant thought provoking issue. I am having a conflict now, it seems the more Christian people I know are always unhappy, frustrated and in a state on confusion. Can’t we all be more serene?

tammy kay - But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9
I needed to read that this morning. Not sure if you did too.
I’m scared to read 7 too. 😉

amy jupin - this is an awesome post–starting with kisses from katie (which i haven’t been able to finish yet because i sob like a newborn baby and can’t get through some parts) and ending with that pic of jess and her adorable fam.
i get each and every part of this post.
i get it.
i am full to the tippy top with these same feelings.
maybe it’s our age…maybe it’s just the point of our lives where we start to realize just how big the world is and how tough parts of it are and how much we desperately want to make it better, and ourselves better in the process.
maybe it’s because we are over the me-me-me-me part of our lives.
and maybe it’s because we know we need to lean on His understanding and not our own.
idk.
…
i love that pic of pam and her family too.
i know you must miss her so much and want to be there in africa too.
did i tell you i worked with a guy that got married last year.
somehow we were talking about africa and he told me that his wife actually went to africa as part of her medical training–in sierra leone!
i just looked at all your pics again so i could spell it right and now i have big fat burning tears in my eyes.
anyway, i just wanted to say, after all this rambling, that i miss you and i understand.
all of it.
i wish, beyond wish really, i pray that one day soon we can sit down and have some coffee and talk.
for hours.
because i think it is exactly what we need.
🙂
xoxoxo.
(and let’s invite kimberlee and laura and chicago jen too!!)

erlfisher - We saw Tom Petty, too! Such a fun concert…and Wildflowers is my favorite as well! If I had known you were going to be there, I would have looked for you – HA!

Jennie - LOVE Katie’s book. She’s from Brentwood, where I live. Pretty amazing what God has done through her!!

Tracy Sheehy - Oh yes I have read both of those book and Seven will also wreck you and kick your tail at the same time!! 🙂

Cindy - I tear up just thinking about Kisses From Katie. I actually got it from the library earlier this year and mentioned it to a friend and she said, “Rats! I was thinking of giving that to you for your birthday.” My response…PLEASE! I can think of nothing I’d like more than my own copy so I can highlight it and write it it, respond to it, take notes in it! I was afraid that when I read it I’d feel so inadequate! How can I compare to giving up everything and moving to Africa? But it completely inspired me…to love like that…right here, right now, even in my own family. Selflessly. As for 7, I’m on the last chapter right now. Can hardly put it down. Another book I want to go through again. More slowly. Truly digest. Change.
As for family photos, so sad (yet happy for you) that you’re taking the year off. Would love to have you capture my family again. But ever so grateful for the photos we got last year!! They are still my favs!! Can’t wait to see all that you’ll do instead! 🙂

Karen F. - Reading 7 right now. Wrecking me. Awesome.
Kisses for Katie has caused me to pray big prayers for our family, especially our daughters. I want to be the kind of parent who says, “I hear God calling us to go to ________. We’re going.” I want to be the kind of parent who hears from her daughter, “God’s calling me to ___________.” and I say, “Let’s go. We’ll get you there.”
Less of me. More of Him. Every single day.

Heidi - FYI. Seven is going to rock your world. Be prepared. It’s good, all good, but be ready. 🙂

Lisa Currie-Gurney - Go for a long walk on your quiet road.
Take a deep breath or two.
Let Him sort through all that is in your head, and on your heart.
Know that you are prayed for friend.
Hugs From My Heart

Julie - Oh my gosh. I bought Kisses for Katie last night in my Kindel. A.MAZ.ING. So inspirational. She is amazing. Thank you for the recommendation. I’m off to tell everyone I know about it.

Su@TheIntentionalHome - I have both of those books on my bookshelf.
I LOVE Kisses From Kate because it is a reminder of what happens when we say yes to God.
It is another reminder that God does not put an age limit on when He starts using you. . or when you can hear His voice. . .or when He gives you a “call on your life” (I read the book aloud to my 3 older kids ages 14, 12, and 11.)
And it is another reminder that God can use ordinary people to do extraordinary Kingdom work. (YES!!! I wonder if that is the pull so many of us feel. . we were made for big, extraordinary work!! And when we are not in the midst of it, we feel unsatisfied).
And 7. . .love Jen Hatmaker. I love her blog post After the Airport. You gotta go to her blog and read After the Airport. . that blog post makes me cry (and laugh) everytime I read it.
Jen Hatmaker recently adopted a 5 year old and a 7 year old from Ethiopia. i too (9 months ago) adopted a 7 year old from Ethiopia.
Her post affirmed me and made me feel not alone. Her post also convicted me. I want to love like she describes in the last few paragraphs of this blog post.
You gotta go read After the Airport by Jen Hatmaker, because even if you have not adopted, we all have many realms of life that can be full of that initial euphoria followed by hard, hard work and times that call for dogged perseverance through many difficulties and challenges.
That post is what made me buy 7 and although I do not like the writing style of the book. . I love the heart. And it made me look around to see where I could live woth less so I could give more.
Oh, what a long comment. . .just got so excited about those 2 books you are reading. May God use them to speak to your heart.
My problem is I read those books and get all excited and moved and inspired and then it wears off and I am back to focusing on decorating my home. Ugh.
Oh, I am excited for you! God has big plans for the Duerksen family. Ya’ll 7 were put together for a reason.

Kelly - I found Katie’s blog awhile back… it wrings your heart out. I follow another blog about making knitting and crocheted squares called Knit A Square and I remember once reading about a little orphaned girl and her wish was just to have someone tuck her in bed at night… I think about almost every night when I tuck my kids in bed. I breaks my heart to think that probably millions of kids go to bed every night with just that one wish… so I’m crocheting squares and wondering what God is calling me to also… but you know, God’s timing is perfect and you will know at exactly the right time (just like me, I’m hoping 😉 what exactly that calling is about… for me, I know that it’s just not quite here yet… Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, Meg. You don’t have a messy heart, I read your blog and I see a very pure heart God-filled woman… I would say you’re just experiencing a calling…

Jacci - Ditto what Laura Phelps said.
I’m reading a book edited by CJ Mahaney called “Worldiness: Resisting the Seduction of a Fallen World”. Here’s an excerpt on the chapter about things – “This may be confounding to you, but it was far easier being a Christian in the poverty of Uganda than in the affluence of the States. Prosperity tempts my laziness; it lulls me away from dependence on the Lord. The affluence draws me toward passivity. It’s a daily battle for dependence upon God versus dependence upon my own strength.”
One of my favorite things about the book is the last chapter, “How to Love the World”. Because it’s not wrong to praise God for our earthly blessings – that our children have food to eat and warm, dry beds. That we have children and a husband at all. That our land isn’t wracked by war. But, we *are* the rich in the world. Every last one of us reading this blog. And we are CALLED to share and to give generously. What does that look like? How do we do that – glorify God in all things, even dressing cute? Good read.
I’ll pray for you (and me) tonight. To not be lulled, but to be alert and vigilant… and generous.

Lorie - The Africa print is gorgeous! And good for you for making a decision for you and your family, even if it meant temporarily giving up something you love. I am sure when you go back to it next year you will be even more passionate about it!

Debby - Got to see Kate at BrookHills in Birmingham earlier this past year when we went to see Mindy. David Platt, the pastor did an interview kind of thing with her. And as she spoke, she would at times look lovingly down in the audience at a couple of her kids that she brought with her and she would wave her fingers at them. You could just see the love she had for them. So cute! And darn, Meg. Jill and I were talking about when the family would all be together for a family shoot. But I totally understand!! Life can be too hectic and we have to decide what is important. Another year, maybe when the little munchkin will be a little older. I LOVE the photo shot of the girls and it hangs in my livingroom. LOVE, LOVE!! I can’t believe we will have 4 granddaughters and 1 grandson. I’m not that old am I???

JD in KC - First – thank you! Thank you for keeping it real. You find a way in every post to make a connection and I so appreciate it! I read your post and want to DO something – read my Bible, take more pictures, call the people I love, hug my kids and husband or just sit on the porch and enjoy God’s creation. Thank you for inspiring and loving and living out loud!

Mama Zen - I would love to see Tom Petty!

tiffany gardner - once again…. i. love. your. blog. me too… to all of that. the last thing you said about pics… even me too. i have an 8, 6 year old and 15 month old. thinking of starting this photo season makes me uneasy. i’m questioning several things and want to know what God is wanting for my life. thanks for reminding me to keep searching. xoxo

Toni :O) - I LOVE that picture of the Macs…sooo adorable…that family just warms my heart to no end. I’m glad you made the decisions you have, your family will appreciate it I’m sure. You actually inspire me to want a simpler life…some days I hate working and hate having such a busy life…never know what the future holds but someday I hope to have that simpler life. Your heart is joyful, cause it bleeds colors onto this blog…we all get that and I know I feel blessed to read what you have to share. Keep smiling and sharing those bright colors!

Lori H - Oh my. Kisses from Katie rocked my world. My comfortable, safe, suburban world. Months later and I still hear her “voice” in my head. I haven’t read Seven and I am a little afraid to, honestly. Katie is amazing! How many high school girls would go down that path? I think about her, and I feel lazy and not-finding-my-purpose. I felt the same way, to some extent, after reading the fiction book, The Poisonwood Bible. One of the main characters has that same dissonance when she comes from living in Africa for years back to the U.S. I love your honest sharing, Meg. I wish I didn’t live so far from you (VA….Kansas).

Suzanne - Oh Meg, I know the messy heart feeling. I have had it for several weeks now. It is so disconcerting and frustrating. You are not alone, sister! I have heard of Katie’s book, but I haven’t read it yet. It is now on my list, along with Heaven is Here. Have a great weekend!

traci - I never comment but the firt part of your blog is the best thing you have written!!! I think about this OFTEN also! How easy for American Christians to go off to Africa for a short time and come back to their pretty life. I share those feelings so often!!

Tina Jacobsen - Oh Meg!! I read Kisses From Katie a few months ago and I don’t think I ever cried so much!! I follow her blog also and wow she is sooooo awesome!! I too have a constant battle of the wants of this world and what God wants of me! Yup..messy heart girl right here!! I want and need to read 7!!
Tina

Jill - Meg, don’t be scared of 7, you will LOVE it. I’ve known Jen for as long as I can remember and she sounds in the book just like she does in real life. It is a safe place…she shares her successes and her failures during each month – which makes her REAL. She shares in such a way that it will make you think and want to take the challenge right along with her, but without the fear of “what if I mess up and don’t do it right” – if you are taking the chance to change your way of thinking like she has done, it will take you amazing places…and you’ll laugh and cry (sometimes at the same time) along the way. Definitely an awesome read. I would also recommend her Interrupted and Ms. Understood. Actually, I’d recommend all of her books, but those are my faves. 🙂 And I LOVE Kisses from Katie…have been following her blog for a few years. I love that girl.

megan@contentedsparrow - reading katie with the kids right now.
and my head and heart are always a mess over the dichotomy over what i want to do and what i do (or don’t do).
joining you in really listening for His leading.
He’s always speaking.
may we have ears to hear
and hearts that trust and obey.

amy cornwell - I’ve followed Katie’s blog for a long time and read her book in January. It’s fantastic. A lot of her blog posts are in the book but it’s neat how they put it together. Definitely makes you think! I haven’t heard of Seven – let us know!

Katie - I am so glad for you, seeing from a distant that God is moving and working and guiding you. I love that you are saying no to one thing for a season and allowing God to doing something different for a season. God is good.
We are selling our house and moving out of state for my husband’s dream job – that is BIG! God is definitely moving…might run into you on the beaches in SW MI cause that is where we will be living!

Terrie G - I so get what you mean by a messy heart…I’m right there with you. I’ve been struggling with it for a little while now. God is slowly allowing me to clean up the mess…but I really wish I was back ‘home’ where I could worship with my girlfriends who ‘get’ me. I miss not having someone I trust to talk to.
Can’t wait to try the book! Been looking for something new to read.
All these pics with one lens…nice work!
It’s my favorite lens too. If you ever want to check out a lens, let me know. I have several different ones! Think I’m taking a photo workshop in ‘N’ town this summer!
And sometimes, you just need to take a break and do what’s right for you & your family.
Good for you! Enjoy whatever endeavor you do next! 🙂

Betsy - Both books… Incredible, prepare to be challenged! 7. Is soooo good!

Sarah @This Farm Family's Life - such a touching post! it’s awesome that you and pam stay in touch and that is so cool for her son! I too am considering taking a year off from taking pictures. It is just too much and I often feel like my family gets put on the back burner. In our little town there is a photographer who has been in business for 30+ years. His wife recently passed away from cancer. I often look to him for advice and he said that he and his wife regret not being present for a lot of things while there kids were little. I don’t want any regrets. Kudos to you for making that decision. I’m sure it’s a huge weight off you shoulders.

Trish - speaking of spending money on things we don’t need. i had told my 6 year old she could take her money and spend it on something she would like at Target. she has a real hard time saving. she just said, “no thanks mom… i shouldn’t be worried about stuff on the world. i should be worried about Heaven. besides i already have jesus!” wow… i have been thinking about that statement for the whole week!

sandi - i asked for her book for christmas… and read it quickly. our seven year old has *always* (you know for like, three years) wanted to be a pediatrician like her aunt brittney. after missions week at school in the fall she came home wanting to be a missionary ~ then she clarified that she would be a doctor who would spend her vacations traveling to other countries to help those in need. as i was reading the book i could so relate to the parents in giving their daughter the freedom to do something so extra-ordinary.

Rachel J - I’ve heard so many things about Kisses From Katie. Life changing things. I’m almost finished with 7, it’s good. Like really good. And I think you will love her candid, wittyness. 🙂
Happy Friday Megalicious! Haha!
Ps. I emailed you for your address, several moons ago. I would like to send you something. A happy package 🙂 Let me know girl!

twitter.com/takingheart - You have me weeping with just a click & looksee of Katie’s blog. Seriously? My day wasn’t supposed to go there… but God has a special way of jilting people like you, who in turn jilt people like me into another world of amazing grace… amazing. Grace.
Thank you. Oh my heart.

Jennifer@beautyinbloom - Oh Meg. Consider me wrecked. I clicked over to Katie’s blog and instantly teared up at her blog header. I am in trouble. Thank you for sharing. 🙂

MommyKnitsJen - Kisses from Katie was the first book I downloaded when I got my Kindle for Christmas. I sat in the debris that is post Christmas and cried at all we had and all that we took for granted. I really started thinking about what we NEEDED and what we just wanted. I think maybe I need to reread it I’ve been on a declutter and simplify rampage lately and I think I need to focus that energy.

happygirl - I booked marked Kate’s blog. I look forward to following her ministry. I have to say, I smiled a little when you said you were too busy to do family portraits. I am CONSTANTLY amazed at how much you do. When do you sleep?

Laura Phelps - This is my CONSTANT pull
and I do mean CONSTANT
want vs need
empty vs full
and really, what is my purpose?
what does God want me to do?
How does He want me to use my talents?
Am I missing something?
how I spend my time and my money has been a HUGE part of what has been on my mind in the last year
it has been a huge test
a test of will…not MY will..but HIS will
a test of self control
discipline
being the person I am created to be
learning not to act on my FEELINGS
doing the right thing
and you are right!
we don’t take ANY THING with us when we die
I remind myself daily to stop worrying about my OUTER APPEARANCE…and focus on the INNER…
MY SOUL
I too want to look cute
I love things
clothes
lattes
iphones
furniture
magazines
but what I want MORE is a clean soul
Oh Meg…you are not in this struggle alone
keep on praying and asking God what you should do
He has all the answers to our BIG questions
then pack your bags and go to Africa…:-)

Lindsey - I found Katie’s blog last week. After reading it and learning her story, I just felt that so much of my life and problems are petty compared to what some people suffer on this earth. Her story is amazing and inspiring. She is my spiritual role-model! What a servant of the Lord! I, too, deeeeeeeply want to go to Africa. It has been in my heart for several years now.

Brianna - I read 7. It’s awesome. And instead of doing everything for a month at a time, I did a version of it doing a week at a time. AND my good friend is visiting Katie from Kisses from Katie RIGHT NOW in Africa. Crazy timing!
Thanks for your thoughts and reminders. You’re great!

Kelly - God is stirring in you! Exciting! Thanks for sharing your journey with us! We can learn so much from each other. It is so good to see into other’s thoughts sometimes. I think it helps us process ours. I have both of those books on my reading list. I’m scared to read both I will admit.
You picked a great family for your one shoot and good for you for picking priorities in how to spend time. It is HARD but one of the biggest ways God can work in us I think. Blessings on you!! Kelly

Dani - I am taking my son to the book store tonight for his b-day. I think I’ll take a look at this book.
Your heart is amazing. God works through you. I am touched each time you write because I see Him. You are an amazing mother, friend, blogger, etc.

Jen - I’m super bummed that I won’t get to see your cute pictures this year but being a photographer myself I completely understand how increadibly time consuming it is. I constantly feel like my passion and my priorities are playing tug of war. Laundry or editing? Uno with the kids or editing? Calling in sick to work to finish editing…Ugh.

seriously sassy mama - For awhile now I have really strived to live a simple life. I am going to add this book to my reading list.

colleen from alabama - I looked at this book today at our church bookstore. I want to read it to my kids this summer. My 12 yr old daughter, who usually rolls her eyes at most of my ideas, said she thought that book would be reaaallly good. Don’t know how my 9 yr old boy will feel. Sometimes i just have to be the mom because they need it! I am praying this book will bring the reality that i know into my children’s hearts. We live in a society that has fed us all the lie that more is always better. Thanks for choosing not to believe the lie. I choose with you. Even when it is painful or seemingly weird. We are living right side up in an upside down world!

Wendi - MY thoughts when reading this…1) I get the debate between having nice things or using $ to help others, but someone like Katie always convinces me to give. 2) YOU don’t need stuff to be cute 🙂 3)God gives us more blessings than we can buy 4) It is so exciting for me to read about what is stirring in your heart and I am looking forward to see what he does.

Kate @ Songs Kate Sang - Hugs to you. You are precious. And I think your heart isn’t messy. In fact, it is quite beautiful to me.

Kristin - Meg, my daughter is reading Kisses for Katie. She’s a HS Sophomore. She texted me from school, crying. She was definitely convicted! We found her blog and after one read of her beautiful thoughts, it’s changed my ways of working, thinking, BEING.
Crap just doesn’t matter.
You don’t know me.
I feel like i know you.
I’ve been reading you for a while.
Hang in there!!!!

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