i have been thinking about this for over a week.
i am not usually so wordy…
i don't want to give a sermon…just some encouragement.
the study book Women of the Bible that our group finished in may…
but i just finished now (i skipped some lessons) had an entire chapter on prov.31.
it has been helpful to my struggles.
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Proverbs 31:10-30 (New International Version)
10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 "Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.
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(the words in color are directly from the book….)
how did you feel when you were first introduced to this Prov. 31 woman…
overwhelmed?
angry that God expected all of this from you?
guilty?
determined to become her?
if you are beaten down by this 'perfect' woman, take heart.
i have good news for you.
She is the IDEAL woman God wants to develop all women to be as they follow Him.
did you catch that?
GOD is the one working the transformation.
'He who began a good work in you, will be perfecting it until the day of Christ Jesus…Phil 1:6'.
Seeing what you can become(by His grace and work) should be a catalyst, not a condemnation.
if you are a perfectionist, an understanding of the truth will set you free from trying to be
or do for Him, so that you will allow Him to make you the woman He wants you to be.
the foundation of all horizontal relationships is the vertical relationship – our relationship
with God gives us the security to be real and vulnerable.
it is walking in God's grace that makes us agents of grace to others.
Even our abilities to grant forgiveness & ask forgiveness is tied to our relationship with God.
we cannot make ourselves into a virtuous woman.
but if we walk with God day after day, yielding our lives to His control,
He will keep making us more like Jesus.
The virtuous woman of proverbs 31 is not a standard or yardstick to measure up to,
but the goal toward which women should be moving.
she is the woman God is developing women to be today as they follow Him.
The first step we can change is not gritting our teeth & trying harder to be the perfect woman.
it is surrender.
the most imp
ortant word in the christian community is not commitment, but surrender.
we can be committed in the flesh, but surrender is admitting what we cannot do in our strength.
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it was just what i needed to hear.
and maybe you did too?
i highly recommend the study book Women of the bible.
it's a lot of homework but i have learned so much…i really enjoyed it and i am ready for book 2 this fall.
Kay - This is an overwhelming chapter, every morning I strive to accomplish one verse, with the Lords help I will
Michelle - Thank you for this post. I have been reading your blog for months and months. This morning. . . I was so humbled by the Lord as I looked around the mess in my house. Later on this afternoon. . . I remembered this post and that I had loved how the book you quoted broke down this often difficult to swallow piece of scripture. Thank you for being honest and open with your life. . . even months later. . . God is using your post to remind me that HE is in control of my life and only HE can make me the ideal woman.
Ann Marie - OK, sure, I get that–it’s cool, God helps us with his big ol’ expectations. But my big problem with that book is that it’s written by men. MEN telling us how to be spiritual women??? Color me confused. 😉 🙂
Christa - I think this Bible verse is entirely about how proud the husband is of his wife. In my opinion this passage is not about what we need to be to our husbands, but the respect a husband should show his wife.
katherine - I just recently started reading your blog, and I love it! Thanks for this great post, I love that chapter. Thanks for your inspiring, encouraging and fun blog….how delightful it was to go back and read your archives and check out your house pics….amazing!!! What a beautiful, fun mom you are! God Bless….kathy
adrienne - as women, it is so important for us to encourage each other. so very, very important 🙂 thanks!
melissa mae - I love that scripture(s). One of my favorite that is in the Book of Mormon is: ” Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else.”
and from one of our apostles: “I humbly thank our Father in Heaven for His daughters, you who were willing to come to earth to live under such uncertain circumstances. Most men could not handle the uncertainties you are asked to live with. Social customs require that you wait to be asked for marriage. You are expected to go with your husband wherever his employment or call takes him. Your environment and neighborhood are determined by his ability to provide, meager or not. You place your life in the Lord’s hands each time you bear a child. He makes no such sacrifice. The blessing of nurturing children and caring for a husband often is intermingled with many routine tasks. But you do all of these things willingly because you are a woman. Generally you have no idea of how truly wonderful and capable you are, how very much appreciated and loved, or how desperately needed, for most men don’t tell you as completely and as often as needed.”
jill j - Re: Janine: I believe you have an issue with surrender. 🙂 As Christians, we are called to “surrender” because we are inadequate. There is a gap between us and God, that only Jesus can fill. We are not able to reach God with by our own means. This is where the notion of surrender comes in. When people talk of surrender, they are not implying what you mean, exactly. We know as Christians that we have to give ourselves fully to Jesus to truly find God. For Him to change us and mold us into the women (and men) that He wants us to be. Surrender is not a bad thing. In fact, it is freeing. God will change us into strong, confident, caring, loving (and everything that you say we can do without surrendering) women IF we can surrender to Him completely.
Mandy - Thank you for posting this. It’s a great reminder. I hope you don’t mind but I linked this post to my blog, I just wanted to pass it along… I think it’s something most of us can use to inspire us of God’s true desire for us.
Thanks Again!
Sarah - We are the axis of our families, aren’t we? Heavy responsiblity but SO true.
Trina McNeilly - I love Pr 31 and I always love to read it in different versions of the Bible. My favorite is vs. 25….she laughs at the future. Or other versions say smiles at the future.. she is never afraid. She has done her preparation but still we can never do enough or be enough and God makes up for that. He ensures our future and everything in it. xx
Trina McNeilly - I love Pr 31 and I always love to read it in different versions of the Bible. My favorite is vs. 25….she laughs at the future. Or other versions say smiles at the future.. she is never afraid. She has done her preparation but still we can never do enough or be enough and God makes up for that. He ensures our future and everything in it. xx
My First Kitchen - My husband actually read this to me the night he proposed. Not to set up me for what he expected thankfully. 🙂 I’m sure this will encourage many. On a different note, I’ve really missed reading your blog! I’ve pretty much fallen off the face of the blog earth with my first pregnancy, and I’m taking a few extra minutes this morning to try and catch up. Whew. But it’s great to be back. I always love stopping by.
Lisa - Hi Meg,
I posted about an attic on July 17th. It just totally reminded me of your attic delema. Maybe take a look and get some inspiration for a great family space. Just a thought.
http://swedaisyspaces.blogspot.com/2009/07/holy-play-house.html
Take care,
Lisa
Janine - I recently found your blog and I enjoy it. I have to comment on this one because I think whoever analyzed that scripture in your book got it all wrong.
I don’t think this has anything to do with “surrender”. I think it is just a reminder to all about how strong we women really are. We may not accomplish all of that in one day or even one year, but we will over a lifetime. That is what a woman/mother/sister/aunt/friend does. We nurture, we provide, we work, we love, we teach, we understand. It has nothing to do with surrendering your self to god, or striving toward the described woman’s perfection. It just has to do with being a woman, and what that means for our lives, and someone recognizing that. I think also that at times our roles as women can be very tough and it is your faith that can help you through those hard times. Women NEVER surrender, we never give up, we never fail. By using the term “surrender” you lose yourself, you lose your identity, you lose period. It weakens your role as a woman, and it cheapens all of the hard work you do. There is nothing wrong with letting the lord guide you, and comfort you and teach you,and give you strength but to surrender? You are giving up because things got too hard and letting the lord take over. That is not fair. Not to you, to your family, or to Him. It’s time to stop waving the white flag and get down to business. Keep on being strong women, and give up this terrible, weakening notion of surrender.
Thank you for letting me share and really giving me something to think about tonight. I hope my perspective/intrepretation will give you something to think about as well.
cre8ivegirl - Love this post. What gret encouragement for women. Just what I needed to hear on a day when I feel less than perfect.
Julie - Thank you for this – thank you, thank you.
casey - I’ve always used that passage of scripture to encourage my hard working gal friends. Thanks for sharing your heart and I know it will bless a lot of people 🙂
Jessica - Thank you for posting this. The ladies from my church did a Bible Study on this last Fall with the book, “Becoming the Woman God Wants Me To Be” by Donna Partow. Honestly, it was a difficult book to get through, because it made me feel like I wasn’t “all that I could be” in God’s eyes. But I think you worded it perfectly above in saying that surrender is one of the most important words in the christian community. Thank you for your insight 🙂
Janelle - Sounds interesting. For some really deep reading, and eye-opening too, I would recommend godless by Dan Barker.
Talia - This is great. Thanks for posting it- it is definitely a great encouragement!
Amber - I am really far off from being a Proverbs 31 woman but I know my Lord loves me just the same if I’m not. He is so good to me. Thanks for this post. :o)
JerriR - Thanks so much! Just what I, “the perfectionist” who seems to never measure up, needed to hear today! I simply love your blog and your willingness to share and inspire!
Roxie's Mom - This is what we read as my mother’s eulogy at her funeral mass last October. We couldn’t come up with anything more fitting for a wife of 68 years, mother of 4, grandmother of 4, and greatgrandmother of 3. I miss her very much.
karen - Thank you for sharing that! God bless you and your family.
Heather @ Cookie Mondays - WOW. thanks.
Sandy Toes - What a wonderful reminder…I have not read that in a while!!!
sandy toe
danyele - love love love it!!!! i try so hard to be that woman…and i fail in so many ways. but i’m getting better every day…and learning more and more. great stuff. thanks for the reminder!
Laura Phelps - (The only thing I own that is linen is green, not purple. See? A failure.)
Fantastic of you to not just post this, but to EXPLAIN this.
Many people I know would rip this to shreds…sad, but true
But only because they would miss the meaning behind it
Yes, I for one really needed this…
but you knew that already, didn’t you?
xo
Victoria~ - Perfection is something I always strive for …and fall short everytime. I must confess, that I took proverbs 31 as a check list. No wonder i failed miserably. lol.. I am anxious to read this book. Thank you for bringing it to my attention.
Victoria~
Kara Hebert - BTW- Doing the bible study by Sharon Jaynes right now called {Power of a Woman’s Words}. It’s AWESOME. I think you will love. You can read the book too w/o doing the study.
Kara Hebert - I’ve just recently started reading your blog and I love it, esp. for posts like this one. This whole blogging world is pretty crazy and I think it can get a little out of hand. Meaning it’s easy to get carried away with wanting things you don’t have etc. So I made a vow to myself to only read the ones that truly enhance my life and make me a better, wiser person. Blogs that minister as well as deal with the beauty in every day REAL life are the best ones. Thank you for sharing that.
In Him,
Kara
misty - i REALLY needed that. thank you.
Amber - Megan…
I have been reading the devotional book “Beautiful In God’s Eyes” by Elizabeth George. I’m not done with it yet…but it has been so amazing for me. Though I still struggle with the ‘finding joy in housework’ for she surely didn’t complain about her daily duties, I find this chapter to be so uplifting. It is truly something to strive for and changes that I cannot make on my own. Thank you for adding a new word to this process…SURRENDERING to Christ and letting him mold me into what I need to be!
Jill J - I just love it when you post about the Bible! Your blog has gotten so big, but you remain the same and share your beliefs.
I gotta say, I felt a sense of freedom the first time I read this passage (in college, 13 years ago, yikes!) I was just starting to understand what it was to be a Christian and thought that meant that I, as a woman, would have to be “submissive” and “quiet.” When I read this and saw the important role that I could play in my family and how the house really revolves around the mom, I was so excited! I didn’t want to just blend into the background and shrink away. I wanted to be involved! I wanted to work and make decisions! And this not only gave me permission, it told me it was expected! How encouraging to read this again today! Thanks
juliann brenner - You are a great mom, Megan. Too bad I didn’t get to know you better before you moved to KS.
Michele - What a great reminder for all of us Moms out there! So many times we try to do all this stuff called life alone…that wasn’t the way it was intended by God! Thanks for the great post.
Erin - I have been thinking about this so much lately. Your post is just what I needed to get into my head. Thank you!
Becky @ Farmgirl Paints - Great post Meg. I would like to take that study in the future. Sounds wonderful…I like the concept of surrender. That is so much better than fighting against our will…letting go!
Debra Leslie - Thanks for the reminder to keep surrendering…it was nice to read some incouraging words today!
Jackie - I’ve always thought of this passage in the present tense. This is who I need to be NOW and why am I not this person NOW {smiles}. I love the commentary on surrender and it being part of our journey. Thank you! ~Jackie
Amy - Proverbs 31 I cannot do or become.
But surrender – now that’s something I can do.
I will happily surrender to Him and let Him transform me.
Thanks for the post!
Angela Conklin - If you only had six weeks to do this study and you needed to choose six of these women, which six would you choose??
Great post! Thanks.
Casey - Thank you! I needed to hear that today.
Anna Marie - I remember feeling overwhelmed and “weighted” when I first read that chapter. It took a while for me to look at it in a different light. But now my heart smiles and I am overjoyed to think that each day that I spend getting closer to HIM, He is molding me into her…that noble woman. I long to be that woman for my husband for my children and for my God! When I want to complain about the laundry, the dishes, the chores, the cooking and the “not getting enough help from my husband” I just need to think about her. “She” doesn’t complain or worry about doing too much or about not getting enough rest. She just does it, because that is what the Lord has called her to do. Thank you for posting this…I haven’t read it in a while and I needed to read that. I am going to have to check that book out.
Lauren - Thank you so much for this post- I really needed it today!
A pocket full of posies... - Oh Meg!! JUST what I needed to be reminded of today!!!…I must admitt the first time I read Proverbs 31, I felt totally overwhelmed…but, funny- when I completely surrender to Him…that overwhelmed feeling goes away and is replaced with peace and joy! He is SO good!
Thanks for the lovely post! a true Blessing today!
Jill
Jocelyn Stott - Great post. Gave me a lot to think about for the day while humbling me at the same time. Thank you for taking the time to share.
Mary Beth - Thank you, Meg, for such a nice post. They read that at my Grandmother’s funeral and i just kept nodding my head…yes, she was that….yes, she did that…..this verse does not scare me. It helps me see what I should be DOING!
Preparation.
A woman Prepares. For everything.
Now if you could talk about that Mary and Margaret thing next…..!
purejoy - i’ll admit. at first i was like, “oh great. more stuff to do. now i have to go buy some land and plant a vineyard, too!!” but you are right. it is God who is doing this in us when we are walking close to Him.
i fall short about every minute of every day. waaaaay short. but i’m glad he doesn’t shoo me away like an annoying pest. he just leads the way and says, “like this. do it like this. now walk here. i’ll lead”
thank goodness and thank GOD!!
and thank you for the reminder!